Two Roads, One Life

I feel like I’m at a crossroads in my life right now.  I’m standing at a fork in the road with two paths in front of me – one on the left and one on the right – each going in a completely different direction.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Path number one follows the “plan.”  When I moved home at the end of May it was to quickly leave a bad situation and be able to gather my life together and move on.  The plan was to stay home for a few months while I saved some money and looked for an apartment.  That’s the path that I have been following for the past month.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

Path number two is a thought that has been in the back of my mind for the past few weeks and has pushed to move it’s way forward.  Path number two involves staying home longer than planned (until May), paying off some/most/all of my debt and going back to school.  There are so many decisions and possible twists and turns on this path that it’s hard to lay out.  It’s certainly the more difficult of the two paths.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I need to layout the positives and negatives of each and really evaluate what each road means to me.  There are so many “what ifs” and there is the affect that it will have on other people.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

So, over the next few weeks, I’ll be talking to the people that I love and trust, doing some research and weighing my options.  A lot has changed for me in the past few months and I need to slow down, look at it all and take it in before I choose my path.  In the end, I think it comes down to asking myself “where do I want my life to go?” and right now, there are so many different answers.

“The Road Not Taken” by Robert Frost

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