“I’m on this new diet. Well, I don’t eat anything and when I feel like I’m about to faint I eat a cube of cheese. I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.” – Emily, The Devil Wears Prada
Emily’s diet sounds better than this detox right now. Although, I’m like 18 stomach flus away from my goal weight. Oh right…this is not about weight. It’s about my overall health. {Rinse and Repeat}
Wednesday night I was discouraged. Between the lunch drink making gag and the dinner drink setting my mouth aflame I was worried about the next two days and actually looking forward to just drinking water. I pressed on though and prepped my lunch shake for the next day. Since I had made two breakfast shakes thinking I would drink one for my snack, I already had that ready.
I took a different approach to the lunch drink – adding in the celery first and chopping alone. That would have worked except once chopped, my Ninja’s blades couldn’t reach the bits so I added in some of the almond milk. That seemed to work ok. Then I added the kale and the seeded and chopped cucumber. It didn’t seem terribly thick so, I added in the rest of the ingredients (except coconut oil because I dropped the glass jar on the kitchen floor) and blended for three minutes. I also added an extra 1/2 cup of almond milk because I needed it to not be so thick. Pouring into the container, I was still skeptical. It still looked pulpy but, maybe not as bad. I skipped making a second shake for a snack because I doubted that would happen.
Fast forward to Thursday morning. I woke up feeling fine…not hungry and possible a little more awake and alert than normal. Although it was really cold outside, I didn’t find myself struggling to get out from under the blankets. I’m still skeptical as to if this is an effect of the juice or a new, healthier mental state. I contemplated making my “Morning Detox Tea” at home but, decided against it. I enjoy having a cup of tea at my desk first thing in the morning while reading and responding to emails. So, I got ready and packed up my stuff and head out to work.
I made my tea with the added probiotic and lemon only as soon as I got to work and savored every sip thinking this might be the only good thing I have all day. I finished the tea around 9:15 and went right to my breakfast drink. I new that wouldn’t be too bad and I was right. It had a little extra zing from the lemon than yesterdays which I attributed to having made it 36 hours ago. It’s still a lot of juice though and it takes a good bit of time to drink. Next it was time to psych myself up for this blasted fabulous lunch drink.
That’s me…kind of
A late morning meeting finished a little early so, I decided to take that extra time to stare down start my lunch drink. But, in two minutes work got crazy and I didn’t end up getting my drink from the fridge until 12:30pm. {Raises Won Ton Soup Container} Here’s to another long afternoon! {Sighs}
On first sip it wasn’t nearly as thick as day 1 and the flavor was a little better. There’s still a bit of pulp and it’s still a lot of juice, though. Ten minutes into my lunch I was interrupted for a meeting. No biggie…I wasn’t dying to finish it anyway. An hour later, I made it back to my desk and, to my surprise, the smoothie was still not terrible. For the most part I was able to drink it normally but, towards the end it got a little sketchy. Lots of pulp had settled and despite my attempts to shake it up, it wasn’t going away. I tried adding water and that didn’t help. In a fit of determination, I decided to alternate sips of smoothie with sips of water. In the end, I finished all but, a couple sips. You may think “why wouldn’t you just finish it?” and the answer is, “because I didn’t want to throw up.” By the time I was done, it was 2:30. That’s about how long it took me to not finish yesterday’s smoothie but, this time I had an interruption so, I’m counting this as a win.
Around 4pm I’m still not hungry but, I’d like to chew something. It’s not that I’m craving anything in particular or that I’m hungry. I think my body just feels like my teeth are being underused. Or something like that. Then, when I had a rumbly in my tumbly, I realized that the desire to chew was connected to my impending hunger. Although I hadn’t made or brought a snack with me, I was heading home. That meant I was only 30 minutes from my dinner shake.
I made my shake and left out the cayenne. I’ve read about the detox properties of the cayenne but, it just wasn’t worth it to me to ruin an otherwise good shake for that small amount of spice. In the end, it tasted much better than day 1 and I was able to finish the drink. I still really wanted to chew something, though. I missed the crunch.
Later at night, I prepped my two shakes for work tomorrow – breakfast and lunch and I caved. Well, I kind of caved but, not really. While I was slicing up the green apple for my lunch shake, I popped a piece of it in my mouth and chewed. It was almost an involuntary reaction although the chewing was not. I really don’t think it matters though since it’s part of the detox and I didn’t have a snack shake today. So there’s my snack shake but, not really.
This semi-accident has me wondering about the necessity of making it all into a smoothie. If you liked the individual ingredients, what would be the harm in eating/drinking them. I would never do this since I despise celery and I wouldn’t really eat raw kale or a whole cucumber without dressing. Wait…I think I just answered my own question.
At the end of day 2, I feel fine…not great, not bad, just fine. I’m looking forward to this ending tomorrow and, based on my experience, I’ve decided to modify my original plan. This post is long enough though, so if you’re interested, look for that in day 3’s post. I’m off to stare longingly at my butterscotch bars.
This is part one in a series of posts about my experience with the Dr. Oz 3 Day Detox. You can find part 1 here and part 3 here.
No Day But Today 